Be prepared

The voice was cultured and educated.

“Mr Hodson, my name is Ackerly, Colonel, retired, and I have a Cesky Terrier. Have you come across this breed before?”

It was quite evident that my erstwhile client was extremely confident that the reply would be negative. Let’s face it: being an extremely rare breed, it would be highly likely that I had never seen one and maybe never even heard of the breed.

My reply was delivered without hesitation.

“Of course, I know of The Cesky Terrier.”

“The Cesky Terrier is, in fact, a cross between the Sealyham terrier and the Scottish terrier. It was created in the late forties by a man called Frantisek Horak, who was a Czech national. Ironically, at the time, Czechoslovakia was a communist state, and the amount of correspondence that took place between Frantisek and people in other countries regarding his terrier brought him to the attention of the secret police. The Cesky Terrier, although considered to be a rare breed, appeared in the UK in the late 80s and was accepted at the Kennel Club as a specific breed in 1990.”

“Furthermore, as I am sure you know, in certain countries, the pronunciation takes the form of calling the dog a Chessky Terrier.”

“How can I be of assistance?”

I never did find out if my client was amazed at my vast knowledge of rare breeds, his in particular, but of course, Mr Ackerly was an officer and a gentleman, and to question the professional would have been bad form. In fact, thinking about it, he would probably have expected me to know.

“Well I have heard you on the Radio. Sunday mornings. David White show. Thought a consultation a good idea.”

Mr Ackerly spoke in the slightly clipped speech that is common among retired military officers. I assume that they never need to explain themselves and keep instructions to the bare minimum so as not to create any confusion regarding their requirements.

A visit was required, and a time and date were agreed upon.

The visit

Mrs Ackerly let me in, and I was ushered into what was Mr Ackerly’s study.

I was not surprised to see covering one wall a regimental flag bearing the battle honours of a regiment. I must say it was an impressive sight.

After an exchange of greetings Mr Ackerly came straight to the point. Again being ex military the information was delivered with short sentences, was precise, giving no cause for misunderstanding. Oh if only we were all able to deliver facts so succinctly.

“Quite frankly, it is damned inconvenient. Stirling has a propensity to urinate when he gets excited. It just leaks out. He doesn’t appear to know he’s doing it. Saw the vet, complete examination, this is not a medical issue. This causes a huge problem when visitors arrive. Stirling is around one year old, although we have only had him for a few weeks. Came from a shelter, very friendly, loveable little dog, wife adores the little fellow. We are at the stage where we dread visitors.”

“Despite loving Stirling, even my wife is struggling and is not happy. We have even considered diapers, but surely that is not a long-term solution.”

“Your opinion would be most welcome and, of course, a solution to the problem.”

I started with the obvious questions

“Does Stirling do this outdoors as well as inside?” I asked.

“Do you have a lot of visitors?”

“Do you know Stirling’s history?”

“How do people react when they meet Stirling?”

The answers were what I expected. The bladder issue happened outdoors as well as in but was less pronounced. There was no history of any consequence and as for visitors, and there were many of them. They all, as one would expect, greeted Stirling with great enthusiasm.

“Mr Ackerly, there is no instant solution to this problem, but it can be eradicated fairly quickly if you, your family and visitors follow a simple set of rules.”

The cure

“It’s all about stopping Stirling getting excited when both you and visitors arrive. We need to stop the enthusiastic greeting, it’s tough, as it’s natural that we want to meet the hosts dog just as you want to greet your pet when you come home.”

“Would it be a good idea if you met Stirling in the garden then my wife won’t need to clear up?” Mr Ackerly asked.

“He is out there now.”

“Good idea,” I replied.

Now for anyone who has never come across a Cesky terrier they have the appearance of a typical terrier, short legged, grey in colour with droopy ears, in fact they look precisely what you would expect, a crossed Sealyham.

As we stepped out through the patio doors, I saw my first and last Cesky terrier. Stirling rushed to greet us and was obviously puzzled as to why we both totally ignored him. The urination was no more than a few drops, and being outdoors presented no problem.

Having established that this was an excitement issue and definitely not submissive or fear-related, I left the following instructions.

“Everyone must ignore Stirling when they arrive.”

“Any loss of urine must be ignored, and NO punishment must be administered.”

“Immediately upon arriving home, both you and your wife must take Stirling outside to the garden.”

“Everything must stay calm for the first few minutes and conversation must be done very quietly without any raised voices.

Bearing in mind that was an excitement issue I didn’t feel it was necessary to go any further. In cases of submission urination it would have been necessary to add, avoid eye contact, squat down when close, only stroke under the chin and never touch the top of the dogs head. Also if it was necessary I had that as a plan B.

Having ensured that there was no doubt regarding my instructions, I departed and suggested that Mr Ackerly telephone me with a progress report in a month.

The call came, the result was as desired, and another client was satisfied.

The trick of the trade

And how was I so conversant with such a rare breed?  That’s very simple. By my telephone were a couple of very large books detailing all recognised breeds and many others not recognised, along with a short history of each dog. This ensured that within seconds, I was able to discuss the attributes and behaviour patterns of breeds many people have never heard of.

To those of you think that this is cheating the truth is that dealing with most behaviour problems is consistent regardless of the breed as any modern behaviourist will confirm. Regarding the case of Stirling I would have given the same advice to the owner of a miniature Yorkshire Terrier or a Great Dane and it’s about giving confidence to the prospective client.

Whilst we are on the subject, depending on which list you refer to, there are approximately 500 breeds worldwide, some recognised and others not, but just because some are not recognised by the establishment doesn’t mean their existence can be ignored.

For instance is a cockerpoo or a labradoodle a breed? Definitely not according to the UK kennel club and quite rightly so, they are cross breeds but they are both becoming popular and have their own club that recognises them as an established breed. How long before they become recognised, after all a Cesky terrier is exactly that; a first cross between two established breeds.