Shankly

Shankly was a yellow Labrador and a canine con artist of the highest order. You see I knew exactly what he was up to but I just couldn’t prove it. In fact, he was probably a candidate for joining up with tricksters Micky Bricks and Three Socks Morgan

The Kessels were a happy, well-adjusted family consisting of mum Lynn, dad Bryan and twelve-year-old daughter Miriam. Bryan was a haulage contractor and was obliged to spend some time away from home. Their pets included a lop eared rabbit called Bugalugs, a cat called Whiskas and Shankly. The names of the rabbit and the cat were very common at the time and as for Shankly, the entire family were all devoted Liverpool football fans.

Lynn was a very attractive, tall, curvy lady who habitually greeted everyone the same. All visitors received the same welcome, she hugged and kissed everybody and insisted that they had a cup of tea. Not that there was any impropriety, the truth is Lynn was just a very demonstrative lady.  I must admit, having experienced the greeting and sitting opposite her drinking tea on many occasions, I came to the conclusion that my greeting didn’t make me special; everybody was treated the same, including animals. She just appeared to have an overdeveloped sense of compassion for everyone and everything. Having said that, if there were more people like Lynn in power, conflict would be a thing of the past.

Minor surgery

All was well until Shankly developed a limp. A visit to the veterinary surgeon showed a small cyst between his toes that required a minor surgical procedure. Shankly was obliged to wear a bandage while the operation site healed. During this post-operation period Shankly was fully exposed to the ministrations of Lynn. During this time, he was allowed on the sofa, where he was cuddled, stroked and received the full force of his mistress’s concern for his wellbeing.

Ten days passed, and Shankly visited the vet to have his stitches removed and the advice given was that normal exercise could be resumed as the operation was a complete success. Unfortunately, Shankly continued to limp, and this was where I put in an appearance. Bryan called me, and I arrived at their very neat and tidy bungalow only to be met for the first time with the full-on greeting from Lynn.

Many years ago, a wise old man advised me that I should never believe anything that I read, half of what I see and double-check everything that I was told. and I might get something close to the truth. It all sounds rather cynical, but sadly, the old man wasn’t far wrong, particularly in this age of social media where so much is written that is patently false.

I checked, therefore, with the vet that there was no medical reason for Shankly’s continued limp. None whatsoever. Chatting with Bryan, it became obvious that Lynn’s compassionate nature went into overdrive when it came to sickness. Family, neighbours, animals, it didn’t matter who or what, Lynn could be relied upon. She would mop fevered brows, provide food for the poor and would happily sit for hours with anybody who needed assistance. At Bryan’s suggestion, I spoke to his wife.

Faking it

“Lynn, I know that you have been concerned about Shankly’s foot, but he is now associating limping with you letting him on the sofa and stroking his leg.”

“To be honest, Shankly is conning you. There is nothing wrong with his foot”

Lynn looked suitably chastened, promised to mend her ways and assured me that she would stop making an unnecessary fuss of Shankly. I left confident that Shankly would dramatically improve.

Two weeks later I was back. Shankly was still limping! This would continue for weeks, and I was convinced that Lynn was still treating Shankly as an invalid despite her protestations.

As the weeks went by, I became more despondent and frustrated. Shankly showed no improvement. Everything I tried failed; he just wouldn’t stop limping. He was not the most energetic dog at the best of times partly because he was slightly overweight, again probably the result of Lynn’s concern that he might go to bed hungry!! Every attempt to encourage  Shankly to run and stop limping met with failure. As I sat with Bryan, I was all set to admit defeat. However, a comment gave me the glimmer of an idea.

“If my brother was here, Shankly would definitely stop limping if Eddy called him.”

“Well, where is he?”

“Australia!!”

“Why would Shankly respond to your brother?”

“Well, Shankly was raised as a puppy by Eddy, but my brother had the chance to go to Australia. He is a paramedic and has a pilot’s licence.”

“So we took Shankly. Eddy is now permanently settled there, so he won’t be coming back.”

A call from Australia

I went home, and as I mulled over Bryan’s comment, the solution to making Shankly run and forget about his leg came to me, and then phoned him.

“Bryan, If you explain to Eddy why, could you record him calling Shankly loudly?”

“Yes, he would do that, no problem.”

The Kessells bungalow had a side passage secured by a solid wooden gate.

This was to be my final try. If this failed, I reckoned that I would have to admit defeat. Beaten by Shankly.

We positioned ourselves on the front lawn. Shankly was free in the back garden, and the side gate was very quietly opened. From the tape recorder came the call.

“Shankly, come boy.”

I timed it, 5 seconds later, Shankly came through the passage at top speed. Not a limp in sight!! He made a belated attempt at lifting his leg, but it was too late. If ever a dog looked embarrassed, this was it. His ashamed face said it all.

Shankly, the con artist had been conned, hoisted by his own petard. Having said that, he made some half-hearted attempts to gain sympathy from Lynn, but she was wise to his shenanigans, and after getting no response from her, he gave up, and the limp disappeared completely.

As a side issue, it had become a matter of honour. Being beaten by a Shankly would have been not only my failure as a behaviourist and a trainer, but it was personal. I am a Manchester United fan!!

As I reminisce, I am reminded of Samantha, the irrepressible owner of Bertie the Boxer. (15 May 2022) There are some ladies you just can’t get cross with. They just live on another planet. They are kind, caring people but incapable of accepting that their actions have contributed to the behaviour of their animals.